The Day After.........

The day after the fire brought forth a mixed bag of emotions. We found ourselves waking in our son's guest room wearing pajamas that had been kindly donated to us the night before.  At first, neither of us said a word, we just lie there staring up at the ceiling trying to process what had happened to us and thinking that just twenty four hours ago our lives had been so very different.   John was the first to get moving and he began to dress into the only and very same clothes he had worn the day before.  I slowly followed suit and sat hopelessly on the edge of the bed and attempted to put on a brave face.  "This sucks" he finally said, "but we are alive and we can start over."  I could hardly sit up and I felt so incredibly tired, just the thought of doing it all over again exhausted me, and I worried where in the world would we get the energy and how was John going to help at the house and still work a full time job?   My heart ached for him because I knew he would be torn between his two obligations, but we needed his income so I was going to have to "big girl" up. And so, while still somewhat in shock, I took a deep breath,  pinned up my hair and began to lay out our itinerary for the day which would begin with a meeting with the insurance adjuster back at the burn site and then to the store for the very basics for one's new life.
I had viewed the burnt house in the dark the night before.  John didn't want to take me to see it but I had insisted.  He was afraid it would be too hard for me but I needed to know what it looked like.  Smoke and small bits of glowing embers are what I mostly remember and an overwhelming sadness that even now as I write this, brings tears to my eyes, but I was certainly not prepared to see what I saw in the light of day.  As I drove through the gates on the driveway it looked like a war zone; burned trees, huge piles of ashes where lush greenery and flowers had been, the boat and it's garage were not even recognizable and our barn and small animal corrals were completely obliterated.  But what was most devastating and so, so sad  was the complete and utter destruction of our family's home.  Twisted and charred metal from our newly purchased kitchen appliances and the tall brick and once stately chimney stacks were all that remained and could be identified, everything else was ash.